things have been really slow. and i’m not up to pace a i was..
somewhat, i should really start pushing when things are slow so i can get more things done.
in a way, it has been a learning time if not rewarding, i learnt that somethings can never be repaired, and perhaps its for better, but then how much do we know how the future gonna end up..
i need somesort of push to keep up and just can’t be wasting like am now.
man, certain things are awesome! can’t wait for the new season, i hope it’s good
All isn’t always lost. the fight continues, never wished that i would have to compare and and decide such a way, but then i’m grateful i still have a choice. sometimes i just feel no one is waiting back, but then, does it matter, i continue to serve and do my part. and that’s truly what it has to be
but then i never thought i would find a friend in you. i guess everything happens for a reason, and i am really greatful for the Dude up there. New people comes in and teaches me so much, gives the appreciation of my efforts that i yearn. making feel all so vital.
i guess after all, they all do come and go, they leave because they should, and they found someone else, and because they forget me.
in the end all of them break my heart.
however, redeemed, and i found new found inspirations that i want to work for, i guessi can never look back. i just can’t…
song that actually felt strangely, when i heard it..somewhat eerie, in the night, in the dark where the room was chilled,and completely staring at ceiling, while the songs plays in the background.. somewhat dark toned, yet sad, but mysterious, and keeps you want to push..and yu close youreyes, and thinking that its all coming to end… i miss my gameboy.. and those times..
sometimes you do your best, and you get the worst.. that’s what they say.. but something from the great menon’s almanac, doesnt’ matter if its worth trying.
so it doesnt matter if i failed once or twice or even a gazzilion times, ain’t no putting me down easily without a fight! i’ll kill the fat lady before she sings*slits throat*..
so holidays been good! life is fluffy!
happy stuff!!=)))
the moon is waning out,
there’s none to admire,
these eyes are looking for you,
the breeze breathing,
the garden laughing,
no one to savour,
my little hands reaching for you
wind will keep blowing
sun will be shining still
nothing ever changing,
the earth and sky are singing for us to live,
for i can still hear their blissful voices
one of my 1st songs i can remember.=)
life is always beautiful, if you ever let it to be.
loved this book.. maybe i can find one day, a person who read them as well as i did,
Pain and loss, they define us as much as happiness or love. Whether it’s a world, or a relationship… Everything has its time. And everything ends. ~sarah jane smith~
These times are so uncertain
There’s a yearning undefined
And people filled with rage
And I thought of all the bad luck,
And all the struggles we went through
We all need a little tenderness
How can love survive in such a graceless age
And the trust and self-assurance that lead to happiness
They’re the very things we kill, I guess
Pride and competition cannot fill these empty arms
And the work they put between us,
You know it doesn’t keep us warm
Because the flesh will get weak
And the ashes will scatter
Make us throw off our contentment
And beg for something more?
The more I know, the less I understand
And all the things I thought I figured out, I have to learn again
I’ve been trying to get down to the heart of the matter
But my will gets weak
And my heart is so shattered
And my thoughts seem to scatter
But I think it’s about forgiveness
Forgiveness
To myself
my 1st ever shivers book was this, and it was the last 1 in the series, i think i read it when i was 10, way before i wrote my diaries.. and i remember that feeling when i lie down, and used liked nearly a few hours to read my 1st book till the end.. slowly and tried to imagine each paragraph.. whoa! and since then imma horror addict..
anyway, i think i’m have a crush.. (yeah, its that soon).. haha.. but its more infactuation-ish.. funny thing is that im getting my old crappy flirty stuff i do..haha! man, her eyes are like stars.. (seriously, they glow).. no idea what she does to them.. but geez woman, i cant look you in the face without feeling funny in my stomach.. but its been nice having coffee with you every weekend, i actually look forward to that, a nice cup of cuppacino and seeing you tell stories with a huge smile.. funny thing is that i never thought that its possible to have super long conversations with you.. its amazing how the world is! =)
and yes, im addicted to this is galifrey by murray gold, saw the 1st time when derek jacobi, the prof yana, realises that he is the master, and undergoes the regenration to sims, which is brilliant, which gives you the psychopath feeling that says, ” yeah man i conqured the world, comes in dancing, kisses the wife, puts nemesis on the wheelchair and sings to his ears that you can decide to let him live or die..” that definitely got style
anyway, kind of slacked off a bit, now its time to work hard back, and so, im doing what i can again, cause i needed the break i need, and now its time to push.. can’t wait for winter to come so that i can spend sometime with myself, doing thing i love and spend enough time with people i care..
i guess if you really want to be happy, happiness is just right there.
anyway, there is this funny bit of doctor who, haha! dont eat pears.. brilliant!! haha! every doctor has their own character that makes you say, oh doctor you brilliant man!
well, things looking better.. i’m in a much more stable situation compared to last year with all those family stuff going on.. sadly, close close friends aren’t really around much.. but then, i guess, i shall move on as well.. and yeap, i guess, things looking much better.. and who know’s i might be ready to date again? haha.. just need to find the right person, though, in a way, in a weird way, i wish the next 1 is similar to my older 1.. had good times and wish to continue more such ways.. or maybe god has even better for me..
speaking bout gods and devils..
whats better? a trapped devil or a loose angel..
ah well, both kills ya.. something from the doctor..
somewhat i learn’t much from this past few weeks. that strength doesnt need to move boulders and mountains, its something that moves the heavy stuff inside of you.. so yeap.. i’m much stronger now, and yes i can carry my own weight and some of yours..
having surgery cycle now, i must say.. i think i’m having a thing for surgery.. woots.. who knows,.. haha..
anyway, enjoying my evenings with good ol’ tmrevolution and coldplay, and some other awesome bands.
and yes, im having tea with a dalek now..since it offered me politely..
to be honest, ,its a roller coaster ride these last few days.. a lot of surprising things and stuff.. anyways, revamped my study plans a little, cause what i was doing earlier, definitely not working out.. so yeap, gotta rethink new ideas and all..
was thinking for making an winter album.. mmm.. i have autumn and spring under my belt, just need a summer and winter tooo..
anyway, seriously saw a super good fan made video.. gosh, makes me glued to the doctor even more.. awesome stuff
do watch it if you are here! and trust me, you would certainly enjoy it~
